EM 2016--Day Twenty-Two Recap

Your “Syndicate Hangover” is proudly presented by “Das Bier”

Only at Karlsruhe’s “Das Fest” can one buy beer bottles labeled “Das Bier”. Your friendly bookie does not often drink beer…but when he does, he prefers “Das Bier”. May we all meet again together under cerulean Southern German Skies. Bleib durstig, Kumpels!

Day 22: Recap

Record—

Spread: 18-32

Straight up: 26-15-9

Hot Girl Standings

Country	Tally	Games Played
France	61	6
Spain	45	4 (finished)
Germany	44	6 (finished)
Poland	44	5 (finished)
Iceland	43	5 (finished)
Wales	42	6 (finished)
Italy	40	5 (finished)
Republic of Ireland	35	4 (finished)
Croatia	33	4 (finished)
Belgium	32	5 (finished)
Switzerland	31	4 (finished)
Portugal	29	6
Northern Ireland	28	4 (finished)
England	26	4 (finished)
Slovakia	25	4 (finished)
Hungary	24	4 (finished)
Turkey	24	3 (finished)
Albania	23	3 (finished)
Romania	21	3 (finished)
Austria	19	3 (finished)
Sweden	18	3 (finished)
Russia	16	3 (finished)
Czech Republic	16	3 (finished)
The Ukraine	11	3 (finished)

Schade! Sometimes it just isn’t your day ; (  You can play gorgeously breathtaking forward thinking football with a brilliant tactical lineup. You can generate heart-stopping chances as heartbreaking as they were pleasing to the eye. You can put forward on the most balanced “team performances” I’ve ever witnessed, yet still come up short when Destiny opts to bring down the hammer.

Your friendly bookie put it best four years ago.

From EM 2012—“Group B Preview”

The Germans have done a vastly superior job of coming up with a name for a group like this. To them, the “Group of Death” is known as “Die Hammer-Gruppe”. Origins of this designation trace back to the German exclamation “Hammer!” Its uses are quite diverse. Most commonly, you would loudly bellow “Hammer!” to express your approval of the music selection/general atmosphere/slut ratio in a club or convey to your friend how great the party was/what a tiger she was in the sack/the speed at which the drugs kicked in/how much you enjoyed bungee jumping naked, etc.

It also happens to be the perfect reaction to some colossally improbable misfortune that has befallen you. For instance, if the tow truck hauling away your ride happened to snap a line at the end of an uphill tug and you witnessed your car violently flipping over no fewer that five times, taking out your mailbox, two children, grandmother, and cat before pinning down your wife at the bottom of the hill and bursting into flames a mere 2.3 seconds after you thanked cruel fate for leaving you at least one person to commiserate with….you might find yourself shrieking “Hammer!”…in spite of the fact that there’s nothing cool about the situation.

We we’re so young then ; )

Despite the fact that the hammer came down hard, I’m proud of my Jungs. : ) they fought hard until the final whistle. They cannot be faulted for giving us a half-assed show. It’s a privilege to watch “Die Nationalmannschaft” and a pleasure when they never stop trying to come up with creative ideas. The final touch may have been lacking today, but heart, thoughtfulness, and spirit certainly weren’t.

Bravo Jungs! Wir stehen auf eure Seite!

Our “Golden Era” continues, even if is was the hosts who ultimately willed themselves into carrying the day. We still have the “Best Football Team in the World”. They just didn’t win today. They didn’t quit on us; not after that demoralizing last minute penalty in the 46^th; not after Boatengs untimely tragic injury; not after Pogba and Griezmann’s flawless capitalization on Kimmich’s mistake. They kept pressing forward until the last whistle. We can ask for nothing more.

“Wir sin dimmer noch Welmeister” = “We are still the World Champions”.

 

No one can take that away from us. We’ll look forward to attending next Summer’s Confederations Cup and (hopefully) facing ze French again. We’ll look forward to defending our crown in a short 23 months.

Today it’s “Vive Le France”!

We’ll be back in two years time. As always, it’s” Semi-Finals or Bust”. Be sure not to get in our way ; ) We’ll be back…to contend. Revel in Today’s Glory. We aren’t going away. ; ) 

I’ll now “draw it up” for my Fatherland for the final time this Summer.

 LINEUP—Deutschland (Match Six)—PROJECTED—4-4-2 

(7/3/2016)

Mario Gomez Mario Götze

Meshut Özil               Thomas Müller

Toni Kroos  Sami Khedira

Jonas Hector             Joshua Kimmich

Emre Can Jerome Boateng

Manuel Neuer

 LINEUP—Deutschland (Match Six)—PROJECTED—4-3-3 

(7/4/2016)

Julian Draxler Mario Götze Thomas Müller

Meshut Özil   Toni Kroos

Andre Schürrle

Jonas Hector             Joshua Kimmich

Emre Can         Jerome Boateng

Manuel Neuer

 LINEUP—Deutschland (Match Six)—PROJECTED—4-4-2 

(7/6/2016)

Julian Draxler  Thomas Müller

Meshut Özil   Toni Kroos

Mario Götze   Bastian Schweinsteiger

Jonas Hector             Joshua Kimmich

Emre Can         Jerome Boateng

Manuel Neuer

 LINEUP—Deutschland (Match Six)—ACTUAL—2-1-3-3-1 

Thomas Müller

Julian Draxler  Toni Kroos    Meshut Özil

Jonas Hector      Emre Can   Joshua Kimmich

Bastian Schweinsteiger

Benedikt Höwedes Jerome Boateng

Manuel Neuer

About as unconventional a formation as I’ve ever seen. The American television punditry was quick to label this a 4-3-3 when then the starters we’re announced, but it proved to be anything but. For much of the first half, Schweine was the only player remaining behind. Hector and Kimmich had clearly been instructed to serve as Phillip-Lahm-like wingbacks. Even Boateng and Höwedes found themselves ahead of Schweine on the pitch most of the time. Emre Can looked directed to switch forward midfielder roles depending on which one won the breaks. Draxler, Özil, and Müller were probably given little instruction other than to crash the box and do their thing. Presumably one of them would come through with some “false 9” magic at some point.

It was an audacious plan that came within a hair’s breadth of working. Can and Kroos did well to carve out enough space for Draxler, Özil, and Müller. They nearly found themselves on the end of some quality balls. Despite a supreme disadvantage in terms of size and speed, Kimmich and Hector hustled down the flanks and got in some decent crosses. Both of them looked overmatched laterally, but they kept plugging away. Brave aerial chances, sickly slick combinations, and sheer dominance on the 50-50s gave the Germans an opportunity to put on a clinic over much of the first 45 minutes. One felt that they deserved a goal, but it wasn’t to be.

Schweine’s handball was legitimate. What’s so shocking about it is how diligent the linesman and referee were in spotting it. Ordinarily, two or three handlings like that inside the 18 will go unnoticed during most matches. Griezmann’s second came courtesy of a good-old-fashioned fuck up from Joshua Kimmich, and some suspect defending from the unready sub Shkodran Mustafi. One can’t really blame the German Defense for the lapse in judgment. They were tasked with emulating “The Best of Phillip Lahm” on both sides of the pitch. That’s a seriously tall fucking order!

It’s true that so many of the quality crosses might have found the back of the net had Gomez been on hand to serve as the target. It’s not exactly a matter of long-term concern, seeing as how Boateng, Can, Götze, and even Leroy Sané demonstrated that they can serve as the substitute “Big Target Man”. The only player who I wincingly and begrudgingly assign poor marks to is Thomas Müller. Something’s wrong. He’s just not the player he used to be. I wonder if he’ll be included in the Kader for much longer. He’s been dipping in form for Bayern lately too. Might be the case that his time is up ; ( ; (

Here are the Grades.

 GRADES—Deutschland (Match One) 

Bastian Schweinsteiger	A+
Sami Khedira	A+
Toni Kroos	A
Manuel Neuer	A
Mario Götze	A
Shkrodan Mustafi	A
Juilan Draxler	B+
Benedict Höwedes	B
Jonas Hector	B
Jerome Boateng	B
Thomas Müller	B-
Meshut Özil	C+

  GRADES—Deutschland (Match Two) 

Manuel Neuer	A
Toni Kroos	A
Meshut Özil	A
Mats Hummels	A
Andre Schürrle	A
Thomas Müller	B
Sami Khedira	B-
Jonas Hector	B-
Julian Draxler	B-
Benedikt Höwedes	C+
Mario Götze	C
Jerome Boateng	C-
Mario Gomez	F

 GRADES—Deutschland (Match Three) 

Mario Gomez	A
Thomas Müller	A
Meshut Özil	A-
Toni Kroos	A-
Manuel Neuer	A-
Joshua Kimmich	B+
Jonas Hector	B
Jerome Boateng	B
Andre Schürrle	B
Sami Khedira	C+
Benedikt Höwedes	C+
Mats Hummels	C
Bastian Schweinsteiger	C
Mario Götze	C

 GRADES—Deutschland (Match Four) 

Julian Draxler	A+
Manuel Neuer	A+
Jerome Boateng	A+
Mario Gomez	A+
Lucas Podolski	A+
Bastian Schweinsteiger	A
Meshut Özil	A-
Toni Kroos	B+
Sami Khedira	B
Jonas Hector	B
Joshua Kimmich	B
Thomas Müller	B-
Mats Hummels	B-
Benedikt Höwedes	C+

 GRADES—Deutschland (Match Five) 

Mario Gomez	A+
Jerome Boateng	A+
Mauel Neuer	A+
Bastian Schweinsteiger	A-
Joshua Kimmich	B+
Julian Draxler	B+
Jonas Hector	B
Toni Kroos	B
Meshut Özil	B
Benedikt Höwedes	B-
Thomas Müller	C+
Mats Hummels	C

 GRADES—Deutschland (Match Six) 

Manuel Neuer	A+
Julian Draxler	A+
Leroy Sané	A+
Jerome Boateng	A
Benedikt Höwedes	A
Emre Can	A
Bastian Schweinsteiger	A-
Meshut Özil	B+
Toni Kroos	B
Jonas Hector	B
Mario Götze	B
Joshua Kimmich	B-
Shkrodan Mustafi	C+
Thomas Müller	D

Poor Schweine was playing a gem of a match, captaining both the midfield and defense in addition to getting his own menacing target on goal. It all collapsed for him after the penalty forced Löw to toss the playbook. One feels for Emre Can as well. He governed the flow with all the flair of a younger Sami Khedira until his yellow card forced him into a conservative corner. Höwedes executed on of the best defensive tackles I’ve ever seen against the lumbering Giroud before getting caught up in that 72^nd minute conflagration.

Draxler danced his feet off. Özil never stopped looking for that perfect assist. Hector and Kimmich left this bookie to scrape his jaw off the floor. It was positively insane what Löw asked of them, but they still managed to deliver. Leroy Sané nearly scored thrice after his late substitution. Götze charged onto the field immediately leaving the doubters by the wayside.

A lot of great footballing efforts went down the drain today, as history will only remember the winners. Few aside from your friendly bookie will remember the details of a footballing fixture in which the better team lost. That’s okay. ; ) Those who focus only on the bottom line have their own “Destiny”. All things come to light eventually.

“Posterity” is more powerful than “Destiny”.

You had some luck on your side today, Froggies ; ) That takes nothing away from your accomplishment. Let’s “Draw it up” for you.

 France—Match Six—PROJECTED (4-2-3-1) 

Oliver Giroud

Dimitri Payet      Paul Pogba

Antoine Griezmann

Blaise Mathuidi  Kingsley Coman

P. Evra L. Koscielny A. Rami B. Sagna

Hugo Lloris

 LINEUP—France—Match Five—ACTUAL (4-2-3-1) 

Oliver Giroud

D. Payet   A. Griezmann  M. Sissoko

Blaise Matuidi  Paul Pogba

Patrice Evra           Bacary Sagna

Laurent Koscielny Samuel Umtiti

Hugo Lloris

Deschamps elected to ride the tide and keep the same starting eleven from the convincing Iceland Victory. No alterations, even after an uninspiring first half. Maintaining Samuel Umtiti was a brave move, but it paid off. Sissoko didn’t exactly have a great match, but he came through when needed. Payet did his job until it came time to get more defensive. Koscielny and Evra performed well above expectations. Mathuidi owned the trenches when it really mattered.

 

All of my talk about the better team losing melts away when one considers just how much heart Antoine Griezmann interjected into this match. I incorrectly stated that the Athletico Madrid forward wasn’t from Alsace simply because he was born in Macon. Griezmann is, in fact, very much a proud Alsatian. He very much wanted to beat the Germans today, and came close to garnering himself a Hat Trick. After crying his heart out on the pitch after the Germans eliminated the French in the Quarterfinals of the 2014 WM, he patiently waited for the day on which he would conduct the “Les Bleaus Orchestra”.

He conducted quite well today, revving up the Marseille Fans with every touch. He deserves this moment. Well done, “Proud Alsatian.” You vindicated your confused heritage with a historic victory that will likely lead to a Third European Crown. ; )

“Riffs of the Day”—Day Twenty-Two

 

Reader: Seriously not disappointed Vicey?

Vicey: Seriously not. I’m still a World Champion, as are you 111-M. Many quality riffs came in today, but this is the one that will lead us to the ever-sentimental “Goodbyes Section”. We all had a great deal of fun. We gambled, cracked wise, traded taunts, and had a great “semi-vacation”. Time to wrap things up. Your friendly bookie shall be in touch with his “Championship Pick”.

French fervor concludes this post. ; )