Your “Syndicate Hangover” is proudly presented by “Perrier”
Your friendly bookie remains more of a San Pellegrino man, but we’ll accord the hosts some respect for their second-rate club soda. Along with La Croix, it’s an acceptable option when the only other alternative happens to be Seltzer Water.
Day 27: Recap
Bookie’s Stats—
Spread: 48-60
Straight up: 63-29-16
What a treat! Los Incas shock the world behind the superhuman efforts of telenovela fella Pedro Gallesse! Whew. It worth delaying the final to watch him pull it off. A Copa America team hasn’t been awarded the day since Edison Flores took Day Twelve back in the first round. Flores scored again in tonight’s bombshell, but it’s Pedro’s turn to top the post.
He even stopped a penalty in the 95th….with his MIND. Christ! I haven’t seen such telepathic keeping since Neuer vs. France in the 2014 WM quarterfinals. Peru might even contest the final with this man in the zone.
S.S.S. Tactical Breakdown
Your friendly bookie obviously doesn't always get it right, but comb back through this chapter’s pages and you’ll see that he’s never steered you wrong with respect to the U.S. Women’s fixtures. Without exception, he’s always kept you on the level.
Having never failed to inform you which USWNT matches will be competitive and which won’t, you’ll do well to take note of my tactical prediction for Sunday’s Final. Do the Dutch stand much of a chance?
Fraid not. We’re in for another U.S. Stomping. Here’s the lowdown.
Lineup—The Netherlands—Match Six (4-3-3) (7/3/2019)
Lieke Martens Vivianne Miedema Lineth Beerensteyn
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Jackie Groenen Sherida Spitse
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Danielle van de Donk
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Merel van Dongen Desiree van Lunteren
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Stephanie van der Gragt Dominique Bloodworth
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Sari van Veenendaal
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As many of us tacticians forecasted, Shanice van de Sanden got dropped in favor of Beerensteyn. The other conjecture, that Spitse and Groenen would flip, materialized to a certain extent, but certainly not enough to warrant a change in this report. Bookie’s social tact takes a brief hiatus here as he glumly communicates that this unmodified 4-3-3 once again produced football that bored my goddamned balls off.
The Leuwinnen furnished nothing but grade-A rubbish. Ugh. Not only is this team completely out of ideas, I can barely bring myself to weep in the wind anymore. Sarina Wiegman doesn't read the Syndicate. What’s the bleeding point? We’ve been tracking this team as close as just about any other throughout the chapter, and the Dutch manager cannot get it through her stubborn skull that van de Donk needs a goddamn midfield partner and Spitse and Groenen are completely wasted.
What the shit is she doing? It’s not as if she doesn’t have a round peg to place in the shape-appropriate opening. The 4-4-2 she used in the fourth match against the Chinese cleared plenty of space for her attackers. Bookie remarked that it was a “championship-winning formula”. The blueprint was there. We WENT OVER THIS ALREADY!
Oh well. Apologies, Dutch Syndicate Members. Sarina Wiegman is not who I thought she was. I had such high praise for her tactics in the FEM 2017 tournament. It appears she’s been frozen in her own monument since then. She doesn’t doubt herself anymore. She keeps the shape and waits for Vivianne to knock in a header late. It’s about as piss-poor management as I’ve ever seen…and you’re about to get your assess handed to you by the “U.S. Bad Girls Club”. Sorry.
We will nevertheless try to build. We have to do so without Lieke, as the latest updates have her listed as doubtful for the Final. Here’s the bookie’s best effort:
Lineup—The Netherlands—Match Seven (Projected) (5-4-1) (7/3/2019)
Vivianne Miedema
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Jackie Groenen Shanice van De Sanden Sherida Spitse
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Danielle van de Donk
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Merel van Dongen Dominique Bloodworth Desiree van Lunteren
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Annouk Dekker Stephanie van der Gragt
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Sari van Veenendaal
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Counter the U.S. defensive five-back system with one of your own. Dekker needs to be in there. If you can manage to prevent them from scoring in the opening 15 minutes—which no team has managed to do as of yet—you might be able to have van De Sanden beat Ertz in central midfield. If Bloodworth can rediscover some of her previous energy, she might free up van de Donk to do something other than try her luck with poor distance efforts.
Groenen and Spitse don’t have to switch if van de Donk can get the machine rolling. Van Dongen and Bloodworth truly have to have the match of their lives not only in terms of innovative attack notions, but also really need to double-up on O’Hara. The chances that they can do both….bookie just thinks all the Dutch girls should just take a couple days off.
There’s no way to make this work; at least not today. I’m told Lyon is a fun place for females to engage in some “retail therapy”. Pleasant shopping, Leuwinnen.
“Riffs of the Day”—Day Twenty-Seven
Reader: Bloodworth’s “Post-partum Rampaging” is subsiding, but it’s definitely a thing.
Vicey: 2-F knows what she’s talking about. She spits fire out of her uterus…if that’s a thing. I’m committed to remaining in another hemisphere when she goes through menopause.
Reader: Looks like no one likes your social media updates.
Vicey: Looks like I don’t give a shit. Bookie doesn’t “like” pictures of his members’ kids. He visits them, spends time with them, and sends them cool Schwag. There’s this thing known as “being useful” in life. Still have no clue why people are posting pictures of their meals on social media when you could be making a friend a sandwich.
Reader: I want Pedro Gallese tested for steroids.
Vicey: Bah ha. Paolo Guerrero probably still has some cups stashed in his locker. Well done, 23-M.
Reader: Please cover the 2020 Copa America, Vicey. I need to see your picks so I can gamble on the opposite.
Vicey: Well shit, 96-M. I guess we have to post a defeated Lionel Messi photo after all.
Just in time for the American Independence Day, we have our first football-less day in nearly ONE FULL Month. Yes, indeed. Your friendly bookie has smashed his previous record of fifteen-straight dailies with an uninterrupted 27-sol-streak.
Of course, it’s not a full day off for the bookmaker as AFCON Elimination Round Lines will drop tomorrow. Two tournaments wind down whilst one heats up.
Africa’s finest fans bid you a most zealous adieu until the next Round of Lines ; )
