Servus Syndicate Members,
What a first round capped by Alex Morgan’s….I don’t even recall how one describes a five-goal performance. It’s called a “hambone” or some such silly thing.
Better not be missing out on this tournament, state-side bettors. If you’re not following the pride of your country, you’re simply a poor American ; )
We’ve much to attend to this evening. Plenty of intriguing fixtures on the slate in Round Two. Since this obviously the tournament for recruiting deceased people to present the lines with your friendly bookie, let’s honor the recently deceased Mac Rebennack. Never easy to say goodbye to a legend.
In his honor, I’ve consecrated these lines by sacrificing a live chicken over the keyboard. Powerful stuff to note as you prepare to enter your bets.
Wednesday, June 12th
Nigeria vs. South Korea
vs. 
We’ll see if we can’t analyze what worked for Yoon Deok-Yeo’s girls in their opening group stage encounter against the hosts. Cho Do-Hyun’s new hairdo was pretty swell. That about covers it. What little possession spells they were able to string together mostly consisted of backward passes. Kang Yu-Mi, Jung Seol-bin, and Lee Geum-Min were total busts in attack. Jang Sei-gi got effectively murdered by Cascarino and Torrent. Ji So-Yun might have gotten a few touches in, but the bookie honestly can’t remember her name being called.
Should Taeguk Nanja wish to replicate the rebound that led them to the Knockouts four years ago, the whole formation strategy needs to shift. The more experienced fullback pairing of Lee Eun-Mi and Kim Hye-Ri should be reinstated. This bookie would even go so far as to bench Jung Seol-Bin in favor of Moon Mi-Ra.
It likely still won’t be enough. There simply aren’t enough defensive options to consolidate in front of their third choice keeper. The much discussed “O-Ordnance” of the Super Falcons was slow to take off against the well-disciplined Norwegians, but will find some gaps here.
Nigerian head coach Thomas Dennerby appeared to get his tactics correct in the first match, but failed to instill basic discipline. Bookie shan’t soon forget how they essentially quit attempting to mark on that early Guro Reiten goal. Their defensive shape on set-pieces was among the strangest I’ve ever witnessed. How often does one see eight players sitting in a straight line in front of goal on a corner? What?!?!
Both teams will play better, but we won’t get a result. Bookie tips a draw.
THE LINE: Pick em’
Deutschland vs. Spain
vs. 
Bookie’s a bit nervous. I actually quite like the Spanish formation. His 4-5-1 essentially mirrors that of the bookie’s projection, with the added benefit of placing Torrejon out on the right flank where she can initiate some decent build-ups. Don’t let the rather underwhelming performance against South Africa fool you. La Roja Feminina are a deeply stacked side bursting at the seams with potential. Lucia Gracia turned out to be quite the talent. She gives the bookie jitters.
If I were Jorge Vida, I’d sent Caldentey, Sampedro, and Gracia directly at our uncertain centerback situation. My chicas would debut in a 4-3-3 and move in for the kill shot. Torrejon could even play central mid, essentially forfeiting the flanks until Gwinn and Huth run themselves ragged. Paredes and Leon can focus on shutting Popp down. Not much the Mädels can do if the target remains unreachable.
Assuming I get to play the hypothetical role of both managers, I’d counter with a 4-1-3-2 that pairs Schüler with Popp, moves Däbritz over to Leupholz’s place in central midfield, and places Gößling just ahead of the defensive line. As for the back four itself, Doorsoun moves out to left fullback while Maier starts opposite her on the right. Hegering retains her position at centerback for now, paired with either Schwers or Elsig.
Doubtful we’ll see such changes. Managers generally don’t like to employ such drastic moves in tournaments. It belies their system and makes them look desperate. I’ve a bad premonition that we’re in for another snoozefest.
Two 4-5-1s cancel one another out and we get another draw.
THE LINE: Pick em’
France vs. Norway
vs. 
How wrong was your friendly bookie when it came to the Grasshoppers? He actually came rather close to projecting the lineup spot-on, correctly predicting ten of the eleven starters. I always knew Haavi was a stretch as a fifth defender. As predicted, the 21-year-old Engen runs the midfield, 24-year-old Reiten starts on the left, and the 23-year-old Vilde Risa occupies a flex role on the right.
Never wavered in my respect for this team’s phenoms. They’re a talented young crew that can prove treacherous when in the mood. Also showed plenty of love for Lisa K. Utland, the one peaking veteran who could turn this team’s fortunes around. Despite the fact that Martin Sjörgen built a team in the same manner that I chose to—incorporating as many LSK Kvinner regulars as possible—I didn’t think it would come together chemistry-wise so fast. It was also inconceivable that the Falcons who simply lay down and die.
Before they book passage to the knockouts, we should see the drawbacks of this approach against the red-hot hosts. Neither team is predicted to implement any major changes. That does not bode well for the LSK Kvinner girls. They won’t have the opportunity to casually polish their long-range passing skills here, as they won’t have those kinds of lanes. It was a lazy Sunday switches balls in the park against Dennerby’s abomination.
Hosts win by a slimmer margin.
THE LINE: France +1 Goal
Thursday, June 13th
Brazil vs. Australia
vs. 
Stock in these two countries heads in divergent directions…or so recent results would have you believe. Your friendly bookie remains unsold on As Canarinhas. The fact that they credibly bested the Jamaicans for their first victory in nearly an entire calendar year wasn’t unforeseen. On the contrary, their favorable group schedule was specifically referenced as their savior. A stronger side would have tripled the goal margin against the Reggae Girlz. Congratulations to Cristiane on her hat trick. Woe unto Andressa Alves for bungling that penalty.
The full Brazilian-team injury report is guaranteed to give you a headache. Marta remains questionable for the Thursday encounter. Erika and Fabiana were late scratches from the tournament roster. Cristiane is rumored to be unfit again. Beatriz isn’t 100 percent. Andressinha may be hurt.
Lovely. Couldn’t have picked a more disoriented side for the Matildas to get back on track against. The only one who could screw this one up is Milicic. Brace yourselves for the Bleiche Mutter of all bookie rants should this one turn out any other way than it should. The Aussies square off against a team missing arguably their best four or five players.
This one ends early.
THE LINE: Australia +2 Goals
China PR vs. South Africa
vs. 
We’re dealing with a very good incarnation of the Steel Roses this year. Jia Xiuquan’s girls managed to look very compelling on the counter in despite the fact that they were missing their best player. We also saw some uncharacteristically bad finishing from Yang Li too. Hard to imagine she won’t play better.
Insofar as the bookie can discern, the Reds play a traditional 4-4-2 that mostly runs on hopeful upfield balls and short crosses. While that may not make for the most exciting football, it should prove more than adequate enough to get the job done against Desiree Ells’s eleven.
The surprise Africans stand a chance of keeping it competitive even without suspended left back Nothandu Villakazi. If you haven’t been following the dailies, the veteran has to sit this one out thanks to some atrocious officiating both on the pitch and in the review room. It may not matter. Bookie can plug in his original projection Lebogang Ramalepe. Karabo Dhlami might just be hungry and confident enough.
It still doesn’t add up. I really don’t think van Wyk and Matlou looked anywhere near qualified to stand tall defensively for much longer. Biyana and Refiloe were junkish too
A brace for one of the Lis.
THE LINE: China PR +2 Goals
Friday, June 14th
Japan vs. Scotland
vs. 
I absolutely refuse to believe that Sugita and Sugasawa were Asako Takakura’s “Big Guns”. She’s obviously concealing something here. Even when Iwabuchi was finally introduced, Yokoyama was the player replaced. Hasegawa then came forward to complete a tame 4-3-3 that had all the attacking prowess of a weather-beaten 20-year-old feline. No one wanted the ball. No one wanted to win.
From time to time in these pages, your friendly bookie tends to assume coaches wish to ease into their best tournament XI when truthfully they’ve just got less attacking options than Greg Berhalter. Maybe Iwabuchi is just done. Perhaps Endo, Miura, Sugita, and Kobayahsi simply aren’t ready. Minami and Shimizu looked like true tyros. Yeah…we’re selling this team. Bookie’s had his look. They need to much time; time that the Highlandresses won’t grant.
Shelley Kerr’s girls appear much stronger than the initial projection suggests. Their phenoms are up to the task. Loved seeing Cuthbert deployed alone up front against one of the best sides in the world. Crichton isn’t even really needed when Little stands her ground. Emslie broke through an exceptionally tough left in the previous match. Imagine what she or Arnot can do here.
A surprisingly strong Scottish side makes their case for second place in this group.
UPSET ALERT
THE LINE: Scotland +1 Goal
Italy vs. Jamaica
vs. 
The tournament sweethearts head into this mismatched fixture toting a much deserved heavyweight scalp. Milena Bertolini’s girls evidently came to play. Spectacular performance from talisman Barbara Bonansea. That’s one feisty Wopinista! Girelli also looked like she was shot out of a cannon. Bookie may be even developing a slight crush on Manuela Giugliano. Hard to resist the girls that are purely batshit nuts. It’s a distinctly male form of debilitating self-sabotage.
The Azzurre certainly count as “Cinderella Candidates”. Bookie isn’t blessing them with his magical wand just yet. For starters, they look pretty raw in terms of organization. From a tactical view, they’re not keeping much of a shape. Cernoia and Gama, as the likely captains of their respective axes, should be keeping their partners in line. It’s not happening. Galli and Guagni and Linari were all over the damn place.
The Reggae Girlz actually stand in contention for Cinderella status themselves. Hard to believe I just wrote that sentence. Believe it or not they piqued my interest somewhat in the Brazil match. Naturally, expectations aren’t difficult to exceed when they’re virtually nil. Nevertheless, I have to say that “Bunny” Shaw was even better than I thought she’d be. Plummer and Blackwood disappointed, but Sweatman and the Swaby sisters didn’t. White Girl keeper impressed too.
The islanders happen to be another team that can’t seem to keep their shape. Even the two sisters don’t appear to be on the same page. This one’s going to be a weird and wild slugfest; odds-on to be very entertaining. At the end of the day, the bookie fully expects to wave his magical wand over the Italians.
Hopefully Maneula Giugliano won’t bite my finger off. That girl’s not stable!
THE LINE: Italy +1 Goal
England vs. Argentina
vs. 
Can’t wait to see Eniola Aluko back in the studio, again. Can’t wait to see what other players Phil Neville showcases next! Can’t wait to see if Nikita Parris can sustain that stamina. Can’t wait to see how Alex Greenwood chooses to accessorize. Can’t wait to see Houghton move the attack. Can’t wait….to see the Argentine girls again?!?
Indeed. Your friendly bookie stumbled upon a most unexpected story when surveying the Day Four action. Carlos Barosso has done a fantastic job with this forgotten program, guiding a group of mostly amateur girls to the country’s first ever point on the women’s grand stage. Bookie had them completely written off. He still does, but wanted to mention again that he really likes the defensive work displayed by Eliana Stabile, Virginia Gomez, Mariana Larroquette, and Augustina Barroso, Ruth Bravo, and Aldana Cometti.
I just finished writing a section about teams that couldn’t maintain their shape. These girls can! Yeah…they’re going to get crushed by the England reserves here, but it was nice to meet them.
THE LINE: England +3 Goals
Saturday, June 15th
The Netherlands vs. Cameroon
vs. 
Djema squandered perhaps his best opportunity to eke out a draw against the group heavyweights in the opening match. Bookie remains somewhat upset about that. Believe it or not, it was within their reach. Had someone picked up Buchanan on that corner, they would have deprived the Canadians of the winner. We’ll likely see starts for Akaba, Enganamouit, and maybe even Mikaela Abam here.
The Lady Lions must go for broke and the Dutch are not invincible. As the Football Ferns demonstrated, an able-bodied 4-2-3-1 can work wonders in rattling the rhythm of midfielders Danielle van de Donk and Jackie Groenen. Gregorious also penetrated the back following some egregious blunders.
Unfortunately, there doesn’t appear to be a way to shut down Martens or Spitse. Monster game from both of them despite the scoreline. Bloodworth looks nice and bright-eyed out of the back Miedema will play better. Can’t back my beloved Indomitables here.
THE LINE: The Netherlands +2 Goals
Canada vs. New Zealand
vs. 
A tepid debut for the likes of Fleming, Beckie, and Prince doesn’t elicit much worry. Such über-young phenoms were merely getting warmed up. Even if they can’t shake the jitters, Huitema, Rose, and Carle remain available off the bench….and that’s just the other gifted youngsters. Heiner-Moller’s veteran kader is even more ridiculously talented.
If there’s one weakness to this Canadian squad, it brings me no pleasure to state that it stems from too many attempts to place the ball at Christine Sinclair’s feet. Yes, bookie went there. So much focus on this woman’s record and monument. Too much focus. She actually doesn’t look so hot all the way up front. That pairing with Fleming is awkward. It reminds one of Birget Prinz and Celia Okoyino da Mbabi in the 2011 FWM. Young and old sometimes just don’t jive.
The Ferns played what I regrettably term a “typical Tom Sermanni”. Sloppy passing. No creative thrust in possession. Low pressing and bad tackles. The Canucks have no excuse not to wake up here. They’ll get rolling early and win big.
THE LINE: Canada +2 Goals
Sunday, June 16th
Sweden vs. Thailand
vs. 
Oh these bloody Swedes. What will it take to exclude them from the major tournaments for a few years? Boring as all fuck, and don’t go blaming it on the rain either. Only the damn Blaugults could be gifted so many giveaways and fail to make use of it. Even the gifted players furnished nothing but Grade A junk. Blackstenius was crap. Rolfö was even worse.
If there was one bright spot, substitute Madelen Janogy—an only thrice capped 23-year-old who plays for Pitea in the Damallsvenskan, shocked us all with an epic “hello world” after her introduction in the 81st. Within two minutes she was setting up Asllani’s goal. Before the final whistle she added her own. S’up, girl. No one had you on the radar. Now you’re pegged.
The hitherto unknown interjected some life into this listless squad. She makes a strong case for a starting spot over here more well-known colleagues. Gerhardsson’s probably too boring to do it.
The Thais will play better, likely even tallying.
THE LINE: Sweden +1 Goal
USA vs. Chile
vs. 
Up next for the USWNT it’s another easy tune-up fight. Let’s see if we can’t come up with an analogy from the days when fighting was actually a sport with gloves, rules, and rings. Liken the U.S. women to 1995’s Mike Tyson. They’re equally as savage when they sense weakness. If Thailand counted as Tyson-McNeely, Chile serves as Buster Mathis Jr. while Sweden will be easier than Frank Bruno. Whoever their Round of 16 opponent ends up being, it’s Bruce Seldon.
Is there a real-deal Holyfield in this competition? You’ll have to wait until the quarterfinals to find out. Not looking likely with all these players engaged and confident. Enjoy this one.
THE LINE: USA +5 Goals
GENTLEMEN, ENTER YOUR WAGERS
