Day 21
Record—
Spread: 24-36
Straight up: 36-12-12
Time to clear the old “incomplete
combustion”(cigarette) and “sweet
elixir of life”(alcohol) throat. Ahem…………
“DEUUUUUTSCHLAND!!!!!! DEUTSCHLAAAAAAAAND! Berlin, Berlin!!
Wirt fahren nach Berlin!! Berlin, Berlin! Wir fahren nach Berlin!!
DEUUUUUTSCHLAND!!!!!!!!!!!!! DEUTSCHLAAAAAAAAAAND!
Werden wir Weltmeister sein????
Werden wir Weltmeister sein????
Wir………..werden………………..Weltmei………ster………SEIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”
JAVOLL!!!
Okay. Where was I? Oh right. Nowhere really. Germany vs.
Spain. Couldn’t ask for a better semi-final. The young European upstarts wish
to test their luck against “Die Obermeistern”. With German flags fluttering at
every outdoor FanFest, we Germans have emerged from our winter caves and are
ready to enjoy the nice weather and proclaim to the entire world that, yes, one
CAN show some pride in this country. Thank God for football and five weeks of
summer weather. Otherwise, we Germans would have thrown ourselves off a boat
into the frigid waters of the Nordsee quite some time ago. Take away our
football team and there is precious little else for us Germans to be openly
proud about. No amount of talent or tactical genius will stop that J
To the Spaniards: Good luck, young Jedis. Where I come from, this is SERIOUS
BUSINESS!!!
Hot Girl Standings
Country
|
Tally
|
Games Played
|
Spain
|
69
|
5
|
Netherlands
|
60
|
5
|
Brazil
|
57
|
5 (finished)
|
Japan
|
54
|
4 (finished)
|
Argentina
|
54
|
5 (finished)
|
Germany
|
50
|
5
|
South Korea
|
49
|
4 (finished)
|
United States
|
45
|
4 (finished)
|
Paraguay
|
40
|
5 (finished)
|
New Zealand
|
37
|
3 (finished)
|
Cameroon
|
35
|
3 (finished)
|
Ghana
|
33
|
5 (finished)
|
Portugal
|
32
|
4 (finished)
|
Italy
|
32
|
3 (finished)
|
South Africa
|
27
|
3 (finished)
|
Cote d’Ivoire
|
26
|
3 (finished)
|
Mexico
|
26
|
4 (finished)
|
Australia
|
24
|
3 (finished)
|
Chile
|
24
|
4 (finished))
|
Greece
|
22
|
3 (finished)
|
England
|
21
|
4 (finished)
|
Denmark
|
20
|
3 (finished)
|
Uruguay
|
18
|
5
|
Honduras
|
16
|
3 (finished)
|
Slovakia
|
14
|
4 (finished)
|
Nigeria
|
12
|
3 (finished)
|
Serbia
|
11
|
3 (finished)
|
Switzerland
|
10
|
3 (finished)
|
Algeria
|
7
|
3 (finished)
|
Slovenia
|
7
|
3 (finished)
|
North Korea
|
4
|
3 (finished)
|
France
|
4
|
3 (finished)
|
So it all comes down to this. Three teams compete for the
title of “Chica’s Champion”. Four games left, two for each team. The Spanish
and the Dutch are the kissable “neck and neck” competitors. The four million
citizens of Uruguay may play for pride. The multi-ethnic, insanely diverse
ladies of Germany are the X-factor. How many hot Turkish girls can they send?
Are Mario Gomez’s sisters still available?
The French love to incessantly brag about their
“multiculturalism”, but the fact remains that they cannot handle it. From the
riots of 2005-2007 to the unprecedented meltdown and subsequent press war over
their “multicultural team”, it is clear that the French merely crave a vain
assimilation/submission pledge from their minorities. Admittedly, the Germans
are also far from perfect in this regard. Nevertheless, they possess the true
multi-racial team and exhibit true (er…..comparatively speaking) racial
harmony. Long live the Real “Ubuntu Champions”. It remains hard for me to
believe you still have a chance to win the “Chicas Championship”. To hell with
all of the myths of “Aryan Beauties”. Germany’s true splendor lies in
dark-haired, dark-skinned hotties proudly waving the Black, Yellow, and Red.
